“You’re up next,” my piano teacher said to me as the young woman on stage struck her final note.

I made my way through the dimness . . . up the stage steps and past velvet curtains. The stately grand piano, which glistened under bright spotlights, awaited my arrival. In my best dress, I bowed to the audience and hoped my feeble smile didn’t betray the butterflies in my stomach. At least nothing flew out of my mouth.

At the piano, I played my piece as I had practiced it many times before . . . forte here, pianissimo there, varying the tempo with the emotion of the piece. Melody and harmony filled the auditorium.

Then, I hit a sour note.

I stopped.

The discordance of a B-flat that should have been a B lingered in the air like a foul smell. And like the dissipation of a nasty smell, the note finally gave way to silence. An overwhelming silence. Was my pounding heart audible? Could the audience hear my mental groan as God’s push dropped my knees to the wrestling mat?

Scrambling to regain my composure, I returned to the beginning of a phrase I knew well and raced to finish the song. After a quick final bow, I exited the stage, not even hearing if the applause was polite or paltry. It didn’t matter. I’d been humbled, pinned to the ground. Match winner: God.

I should have seen it coming, of course. Prideful prayers like mine, which try to control or change God, usually succeed only in changing, somewhat painfully, the one who has prayed. Scripture tells us that this is what happened when Jacob wrestled with a messenger of God (Genesis 32:25). He came out of the encounter with a wrenched hip, a limp and a new name. My own struggle with God left me with a bruised ego, a personal understanding of humility and, after a time, a new attitude in prayer.

No Longer a Wrestler
God wants us come to Him in prayer with all our needs. We can ask for anything. Jesus himself told us this in Luke 11:9. Yet, the attitude with which we approach God matters to Him. Our motivation can’t be that of a wrestler, struggling for power, control and domination. Check out what James 4:3 says: “When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.”

An Attitude of Thanks
As we learn to pray with gratitude, we’re changed so that our hearts conform more to the heart of Christ, our true model for prayer. Try approaching God with an attitude of THANKS and see if this strategy makes a difference in your prayer life!

Trust: “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding” (Proverbs 3:5). God wants us to continue to have faith in His way, even when we don’t comprehend His answers or His timing.

Humility: “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble” (1 Peter 5:5). Our realization that God alone is God and we are not pleases Him. He wants us to have a realistic picture of our importance in the world, one that allows us to acknowledge and use our strengths, but also to admit our weaknesses to others and to Him.

Attentiveness: “Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful” (Colossians 4:2). God wants us to pay attention to Him. And He makes himself known to us in myriad ways. Look and listen for Him.

No fear. “ ‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future’ ” (Jeremiah 29: 11). Giving control to God through prayer may seem like taking a leap into the unknown, and perhaps even the uncomfortable, and that can be frightening! But when we have a God-sized parachute on our backs, what’s there to fear?

Knowledge of God’s Word. “If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given to you” (John 15:7). As we learn more about God through the study of Scripture, our prayers become more in line with His will and desires for us. God rewards our efforts to know Him.

Surprise! After Paul tells us to present our needs to God with gratitude (Philippians 4:6), he assures us, “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:7).

God doesn’t always answer our prayers as we expect or as we desire, but He does answer. Sometimes He give us a no. And sometimes He gives us what we need instead of what we want. And other times He answers with more than we ever imagined possible. God likes to surprise us!

Under God’s Mighty Hand
At my piano recital the following year, I came to God with a new heart, one that had learned to be THANKful. As I approached the piano, I prayed, “Father, I play this piece as a gift to You.”

After the concert, I knew His thank you in return when my piano teacher said, “That was the best you’ve ever played that piece.”

I felt God’s hands lifting me up.