But all that’s changed now. I’m not really sure when it happened; it might have been around the time Aaron joined me in high school. But for years now, we’ve gotten along really well. When we lived at home, sometimes Aaron would come into my room and sit on the floor with me, and we’d talk for hours, just like best friends. We could tell each other secrets or share a car without a lot of hassle. We could even borrow money from each other and not have to worry about whether we’d be paid back. If I was stressed about a date, Aaron was there to calm me down or he would arrange to double with one of my friends so he could be there with me.

Looking back, I’m not sure when or how we became friends, but here are a few things that helped.

Finding the "Want-To"
My parents used to try to talk Aaron and me into liking each other. "Your brother," they would tell me, "is the only friend you can take with you everywhere we move, every vacation we take and everywhere you go."

I used to think, Big deal!, when they said that, but eventually I started to want to get along with my brother. I got tired of being mad at him, being mean to him and crying almost every day because of one of our fights. When I decided I wanted to get along with him, things started to change. He obviously had the "want-to" too, because it showed in our relationship.

Looking at the Bright Side
Aaron and I also learned to look at the good in each other instead of the bad. When I look at my brother now, I see a good-looking, six-foot-tall 19-year-old. But more importantly, I see an amazing work of God. He’s so talented that he taught himself to play the guitar in only a few months, and in high school he played during our youth group’s worship times. Not only that, but he also has an amazingly gentle spirit. He hates to hurt people and hates to let people down.

He always treats a girl like a princess, including my mom and me. He pulls out chairs, opens doors and always makes sure we’re warm and comfortable. He’s loving and sensitive and tries to make Christlike decisions, and he never backs down from them.

I suppose he has plenty of faults, just like anyone else, but I couldn’t find any man I look up to more (besides my dad, but Aaron learned from him so it’s fitting). And I know Aaron always sees good in me because he says kind things to me and treats me well.

The Loyalty Factor
Something else that pulled us closer was the loyalty we showed each other. Aaron and I both knew that we could talk with each other, whether it was about guy/girl stuff, school or even our relationships with Christ. I also knew that if anyone ever messed with me, my "big" little brother would be there to take him or her down! And Aaron knew that if I ever could take anyone down for him, I would. He knew that I’d always stick up for him and be loyal to him no matter what happened.

Learning to Listen
I used to try to live my brother’s life for him. I thought I knew what he wanted or needed better than he did. I’d tell him what to wear, what to buy and who he should like or date. Of course, he listened to absolutely nothing I said. He didn’t want his big sister making decisions for him, and all I wanted was for him to listen to me.

We started to get along much better when I realized how annoying that was to him. I still have trouble sometimes, but he works with me and reminds me when I get too bossy or pushy. And now that I’m not constantly giving him advice and telling him what to do, he comes to me for advice. Aaron has become a great listener for me, too. He’ll drop what he’s doing to hug me or let me cry and let out all my problems. He doesn’t always give me advice because he’s learned that usually all I need is someone to listen to me and let me cry.

Give and Take
Aaron and I learned to compromise, too. When we did have a disagreement, we figured out a solution that we could both live with, something that wouldn’t make either of us feel mad or cheated.

For example, when we were younger we bought a Jeep and agreed to make the payments together. We also agreed that we would alternate weeks, so that it was "his" car one week and "my" car the next. But if it was my week to use the Jeep and he had no other way to get to Young Life, I’d catch a ride to work so he could drive the Jeep. He did the same kind of thing for me. We learned that compromising and working out our problems made things easier for both of us.

The Jesus Factor
The main thing that helped Aaron and me get along during high school and that continues to help us today is the relationship each of us has with Jesus Christ. As high schoolers, we both tried to stay grounded in Him. Our relationships with Jesus gave us common ground to build on and the same thoughts and goals to work toward. We didn’t always agree about a situation, but we did agree on how to act toward each other because we read the same Bible and tried to obey what it said.

There were so many benefits to having a close relationship with my brother while we were both in our teens. I always had someone to ask if my outfit looked good, and he always had someone to share a great day with. We could also use each other’s shoulder to cry on. It was kind of like what my mom and dad said when we were younger: My friendships may change as I get older, but I will always have the same brother.